2 1/2

*Written on December 8th:

My mama always celebrated half birthdays with me & Michael since we were born on each other's half birthdays, so I will too. 

My little wildflower is 2 1/2 today. The past 2 months or so have been difficult & trying for a good bit of the time. Stella's been feeling all the feelings lately & hasn't been 100% well so I know that's contributed to things. Yesterday was an exception & I'm so thankful given the circumstances. We attended a funeral without Donald & I'm happy to report that she was fantastic all day. Aside from her blowing air on her arm to make a farting noise in church & making 3 grown men laugh, she was perfect. She requested blueberry pancakes for lunch so as a reward, I took her to Cracker Barrel. This picture was taken outside of CB. As you can see, Teddy goes just about everywhere with us. And Mable the Moo Cow is a new friend. We got her from the Christmas Tree lot-she's handmade. Out of a table full of homemade & hand carved reindeer & cows, she, of course, chose the cow.

She's obsessed with Frozen thanks to my parents. She tells me just about everyday that she is Queen Elsa, I'm Princess Anna, Daddy is Kristoff, Bandit is Sven & Teddy is Olaf. Each day we either do Anna hair or Elsa hair. I can't French braid but I make Elsa hair work good enough but if anyone wants to school me, I'm game. 

Stella got a "new" bed Sunday seeing the joy & excitement in her face when she walked in was so rewarding as a parent. I finally removed the diaper changing pad & the wipes warmer from her dresser. I haven't used it in so so long but Donald would occasionally sit her on it. I've redone her bathroom & made it a little more "her" also.

She's so smart & it blows me away. Yesterday, at lunch she told "Mommy, sometimes when there's a lot of people & they're loud & they want to touch me, it scares me." Just hearing those words from her mouth makes me think we are on our way to moving on from "just being difficult" (apparently she heard me a few times, although I mostly say this just teasing).  In comes my Tula carrier that has saved me from sore arms, provides us both with comfort or warmth, gives her little legs a rest & just takes away some of the stress of parenting. I'm so happy I've been wearing her since she was a few weeks old & she still loves to be worn & can articulate to me her exact feelings. One of her favorite movies right now is the original Charlotte's Web & I think of the beginning when the goose urges Wilbur to talk. He sings "Isn't great that I articulate, isn't it grand that you can understand." We are so blessed to have such a smart girl who can tell us exactly what she wants & needs. She  radiates such personality everywhere she goes & has a budding imagination that's so fun to watch. 

Stella has started brushing & playing with my hair lately & I'm thrilled we've got to this point. She pretends to braid it & even reaches to her lips get a pretend ponytail holder (since I have to use my teeth to get them open). 

She's still stingy with her kisses. She tells me "those are Daddy's kisses." But I do get back hugs whenever I squat down.  I also still get snuggles in the bed in the morning along with couch/chair snuggles throughout the day & cuddles at night when I put her to bed. Yep, we are still rocking to bed. Some nights I would love for her to just go to bed by herself. On the rare occasion it does but even then I miss the cuddles, feeling her breath on me, seeing her long beautiful eyelashes fan out across her chubby cheeks. She'll go to bed "like a big girl" for her Daddy but not for me. But that's ok. Especially when we've had difficult days, I just want to hold her & sit in peace with her. 

She's very 2 1/2 right now. Temperamental & difficult are two terms that describe her very well at this stage. 

She also does what can best be described as the ostrich's head in the sand move. If someone she doesn't know or even someone she does know talks to her she'll try to hide behind one of us. Or if she gets in trouble she'll run & hide. Or she'll just cover her eyes, because toddler logic, right. I can't see you, you can't see me. But she has the best imagination & I love seeing it grow. She loves to chase B around and head butt him? It's more gentle than an actual head butt but that's the best way to describe it. She just pushes her head into his side & tries to push him over I guess. I don't know. She thinks it's hilarious. 

Really learning what it means when they say "The days are long but the years are short."